We're Vikings, it's an occupational hazard.

I was going to write a post about what a motherfucking shitty commute I had this morning, thanks to rain, bumper to bumper traffic, and a "low air pressure" light while stuck dead in the middle of said traffic.  However, after parking on the side of the 395, inspecting the tires in steady beating rain while wearing a dress and heeled boots, bitching at The Spouse's voice mail about how pissed I am with the Batmobile's tires, and conveying the level of my unhappiness at the dealership's service man, I found the perfect Christmas gift for me while waiting for a verdict:

It's called a Beardhead, and this snazzy company makes them.  How awesome is that?!?  Best of all, you can change out the mustache, in case you are in mood for a fu manchu, mario, or walrus mustache!!!  I seriously think I need one of these to walk the dogs in. 

If that doesn't float your boat, you could always buy me this:

The helmets also come in Viking and Spartan. 

I kinda think I need the Valkyrie helmet. 

I kinda think The Spouse will disagree. 

*Please note that while I have posted pics things I love, I have gotten paid exactly bupkis. However, I would marry this hat and have its babies if Beardhead decided to send me one. There, are you happy FCC?*

Working Mother Fail

My entire morning was craptastic.  I dropped the kids off an school only to see a pile of gifts for Batman’s teachers that they were opening (spa robes!?!) and I got them nothing for the last day of school.  Dropped Robin off.  Got in the car, called The Spouse, and headed to Target where I power shopped a straw tote bag of summer stuff for the teachers (beach towels, freezer pops, water bottle, chocolate, sunscreen) and thank you notes.  Went home to non-stop dog barking while I artfully arranged the totes and left them on the table for The Spouse to retrieve and deliver, then headed to 395. 

Thankfully, I heard about the Pentagon suspicious vehicle mess before driving into it.  I stayed on the main line.  Got off to pee.  Drove through town to Columbia Pike, took 50 to 66 to DC. 

Arrived at 10:25.  Probably an hour later than I would have been due to the traffic.