Wednesday, February 29, 2012


Busy, busy, busy today.  Just a minute to pop in to say how I excited I am to be interviewing potential minions interns. My criteria is pretty stringent:  they must be literate and not a serial killer. I really need one at home, but I guess I will have to make do with one in the office.  Hope someone works out.

Afternoon update:  Have extended an offer...

Monday, February 27, 2012


Batman announced last week at dinner that his school would be having a lockdown drill.  He proceeded to tell us all about what he had been told he would experience.  There were, apparently, some aliens and clone troopers involved.  That's one hell of a lockdown drill, kid.  He was somewhat less enthusiastic when it was over.  Apparently, the clone troopers didn't show.  Bummer.

I hate that my children live in a world where they have to participate in lockdown drills, and I pray they will never have to participate in a real lockdown.  I would trade my soul with the devil for them not to be the reason for the lockdown.

When does parenting get easier?

Thursday, February 23, 2012


The house that I've had a crush on has gone under contract.  That's fine.  There will be other houses that hopefully won't need a complete bathroom remodel.  And more houses should be coming on the market as we get closer to spring/summer.

Still, I'm a little bummed.

Friday, February 17, 2012

My Fetish

I have a Barbie Fetish, have I mentioned that before?  Oh, how I love Barbie.  Many feminists despise her because they think she presents an unrealistic version of how women are expected to look and that girls will suffer because they will never live up to that ideal.  Me?  I loved Barbie when I was growing up because she could be whatever she wanted to be and was always properly attired.  Yes, it helps that I never struggled with my weight until recently, but I don't have any boobs to speak of and I'm still somewhat well adjusted.

Now that we have that out of the way, let's take a look at today's purchase, shall we?

Oh, yes.  I may not have the royal wedding tea towels or postage stamps, but I have the Royal Wedding Barbies on pre-order!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Give some VD love

Happy Valentine's Day, lovers!  I myself am not a huge fan of VD (either meaning).  I don't hate it or run screaming from it like either one of my husbands, but I don't really embrace it either.

The Spouse hates having to live up to VD expectations.  And, I'll admit, I expect flowers for VD. (I don't care who gets them for me.  I'll buy them myself if I have to.)  But I don't expect nor want jewelry or gigantic stuffed animals.  A fancy dinner would be nice, but that's only because I really like to eat.  The Other Spouse hates VD because he is a hopeless romantic who hasn't found that special someone to spend the day with, but I keep holding out hope.  I strongly support gay marriage because one day I hope he marries a well connected rich man with a beach house and has a full open bar at the wedding.  

But now I have two men in my life who adore Valentine's Day.  I received the most awesome pinch pot yesterday.  I was going to bring it in to my office to join the other made-with-love pottery in my collection, however, Batman decided it should stay home and reside in our new "collection cabinet" where the only other occupant is a box of spare hardware.

Tell me this doesn't melt your heart:

It is quite possibly the best VD gift I have ever received, aside from my stuffed dog Jojo that I received when I was 7 and slept with for many years until the Skye Dog destroyed him in an episode I like to call "The Rise of the Phoenix."  But that's a story for another time.

I spent my lunch hour running around downtown trying to find the perfect (not too expensive, not too extravagant) gifts for them for VD.  I found light up battery powered spinning tops that look like UFOs.  I think they will be a hit.  They are also each getting a frosted sugar cookie.  I think that's pretty good.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Dead Celeb Snark

So many things from the weekend to comment on.

Whitney Houston died.  Sadly, her career died long before that.  I know, I know, it's too soon and I'll get haters, but it's true.  The woman threw away her career and angelic voice.  Hate all you want, you know it's true.

I missed my Grammy pre-game show.  I was horrified that I forgot - FORGOT! - about a red carpet!!  The Grammys themselves were ok.  The Ladies Love Cool James and I'm one of them.  Aside from Adele, I wasn't too impressed with the performances.  I don't think I'll ever forgive Chris Brown, so I thought there was way too much of him on the program.  What the Hell was that, Nikki Minaj?  I just didn't get it.  Does that mean I'm old?  It does, doesn't it?  Damn it.

I'm craving candy and wish I had a Snickers or a Take 5 or something.

It's budget day and I need to get back to it.  Happy FY 2013, y'all!

Friday, February 10, 2012


Taking Batman to the eye doctor this afternoon for his first visit.  He's been struggling in school and I hope that maybe needing/getting glasses will help.

Except I know it won't, because he's not struggling with seeing stuff, he's struggling with keeping his mouth shut and being respectful of the teachers/librarians/gym teacher/other adults at school.  But a mother can dream, right?

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Mommy Dearest

The dogs are strongly considering getting me this for Mother's Day:

I loved it in berry, but it's sold out.  It would have been nice for that color pop that is so on trend right now.  Alas, it may have to be navy.

I love those dogs.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

You Say it's Your Birthday!

I've been trying to think of how to describe exactly how bad The Spouse's birthday dinner was.  Y'all, it was bad.  And not the good bad, like sick is now.  But the bad bad, like sick used to be. Norovirus on a cruise ship full of old people, bad.

The Spouse and I took the Dynamic Duo to Famous Dave's for his birthday dinner.  Because Batman refuses to eat nearly anything, we stopped at The Chicken Nugget Store and picked up four boxes of nuggets for the two of them to share.  (We always order Robin a kid's meal with an extra plate and a drink for Batman, and we always tip on the cost of another kids meal so don't think we are stiffing the waitstaff, 'kay.)

From the time we arrived, one of the children - if not both - had their head on the table crying.  The smallest thing set them off.  It was as if we were at a table with PMSing junior high girls.  Oh, the drama!  I wanted to sit next to you.  He has more nuggets than me.  I wanted lemonade, not milk.  No, I meant milk, not lemonade.

The waitress kept asking if there was anything she could do.  Why, yes, you could take the kids out to the car and sit with them while we enjoy our meal in peace.  Or drive us home, so we can drink heavily.  I smiled calmly and said that we were out having a very happy birthday celebration for Daddy, couldn't she tell?

After 12 long hours in kid time - about 45 minutes in real time - dinner was over and we were released back into the wild so we could continue the good times in the privacy of our Batcave.

Happy Birthday, honey.

Friday, February 3, 2012

Momma's Boy

This weekend we will be celebrating The Spouse's birthday.  How to celebrate the birthday of someone who really dislikes his birthday?  I've been trying to answer that question for the past 13 years.

My mother in law spoiled him for any future women by making him a special strawberry cake in special tiered heart shaped cake pans that had to be lined with waxed paper cut just so.  When we got engaged, she gave me the pans and the recipe and told me it was now my job to make the cake.  It was not fun.  Decidedly not fun.  But delicious.  When the Dynamic Duo joined the family, I got The Spouse to agree to new heart shaped pans.  They are not tiered but they are non-stick and don't have to be lined. It has made the job easier.  Easier = highly more likely he will get his cake on or near his birthday and not when I summon the energy to finally outline and cut the damned waxed paper.

Robin has been talking about this all week and can. not. wait. to help me make the cake (though he would prefer it be lemon, thankyouverymuch.)  He was rather disappointed when I told him this morning I would not be baking at the crack of dawn, and we would need to wait until after school/work to get started.  I'm a killjoy.

Lord, beer me strength.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Odds and Ends

What have I been up to when I haven't been here:

  • Taking my kids to basketball, soccer, Chuck E. Cheese, the dentist, a playdate/lunch with friends, and for haircuts.  
  • Visiting open houses.  No Wayne Manor yet, but lots of possibilities. Trying to figure out which neighborhood in Gotham City to settle on.
  • Tap dancing.  It was tough this week.  My legs were tired before I got there and it just made it worse.  
  • Getting junk/treasures ready for a consignment sale.
  • Walking a friend through cloth diapering, and being sad that my days of cloth diapering were over.  Silly, I know.
  • Cleaning up after vomiting dogs and a little boy who can't aim in the toilet.
  • Contemplating an anniversary trip with The Spouse.